IMOEx ← The practices
✦ Strategy 1 of 6

Follow their lead

Join your child's world for five minutes. No teaching, no redirecting. Just be where they are.

3 minConnection arc
  1. 1
    The simplest thing you can do tonight
    Start here

    For the next five minutes, do whatever your child is already doing. No teaching. No redirecting. Just join their world.

    This is where every research-backed parent coaching program begins. You are doing the same work.
  2. 2
    Watch before you act
    Watch first

    Sit near your child. Notice what they're looking at, touching, or doing. That's your entry point.

    If they're lining up cars, line up a car. If they're spinning, spin nearby. Match the energy, not the expectation.

  3. 3
    Imitate, don't instruct
    Mirror them

    Copy what your child does. Use the same toy the same way. Make the same sounds. Researchers call this contingent imitation. You are showing your child: what you do is worth joining.

    "You're not performing. You're saying: I see you. What you're doing matters."

  4. 4
    Why this works
    The research

    When you follow instead of lead, you reduce the demand on your child's processing. They don't have to decode what you want. They just notice you're there.

    In a 2024 study, parents who practiced this needed to prompt their child less and less over time. Eye contact and shared attention improved the longer they kept at it. This was measured, not guessed.

  5. 5
    Try it tonight
    Tonight

    Pick one moment today. Which feels most natural?

That's it. Seriously.
No homework. Just five minutes of following their lead tonight.
// strategy 1: unlocked ✦
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